[Potcher]

Curtiram com o Michael d++...
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[andgarciar]

CASO PENSADO

O advogado recém-formado chega contente para o pai:
- Papai, resolvi aquele caso que o senhor está tentando há mais de dez anos !
O pai dá-lhe um violento tapa e grita:
- Seu burro! É aquele caso que tem nos sustentado nos últimos dez anos!

[aninha_12]

Piada de advogado: Um advogado criminalista acorda com o telefone tocando de madrugada.
- Alô?
- Doutor, preciso de sua ajuda. Acabei de matar um homem e me disseram que o senhor é muito bom.
- Sinto muito amigo mas não atendo de madrugada.
- Eu pago bem doutor. Pago R$ 10.000,00.
- Infelizmente não vai ser possível.
- Doutor, eu pago R$ 50.000,00 na hora
- Bem, em primeiro lugar vc não matou ninguém.

[Teresa Pereira]

O que é um pontinho vermelho na parede?




R: Um morango alpinista.

[andgarciar]

CONVERSA ENTRE DUAS MORTAS
- Morri congelada.
- Ai que horror!!! Deve ter sido horrível! Como é morrer congelada?
- Bom, no começo é muito ruim: primeiro são os arrepios, depois as dores nos dedos das mãos e dos pés, tudo congelando...
Mas, depois veio um sono muito forte e eu perdi a consciência.
- E você, como morreu?
- Eu?????? Morri de ataque cardíaco.
Eu estava desconfiada que meu marido estava me traindo.
Então, um dia cheguei em casa mais cedo, corri até ao quarto e ele estava na cama, calmamente assistindo televisão.
Ainda desconfiada, corri até o porão para ver se encontrava alguma mulher escondida, mas não encontrei ninguém.
Depois, corri até o segundo andar, mas também não vi ninguém.
Então, subi até o sótão e, ao subir as escadas, esbaforida, tive um ataque cardíaco e caí morta.
- Puxa, que pena... Se você tivesse procurado no freezer, nós duas estaríamos vivas!

[Mallmann]

rsrsrsrrs

[horfaifteralf]

[OffinihewsLes]

Speed
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Server Software
Server software can also fake a site. UNIX and Windows NT are the most universal server software environments. Advanced developers should be sensible of what applications they make be using and assess which software environment will in the most suitable way suit their needs. Some hosting companies single proffer everybody of the two software options.

Security
Protecting a purlieus's data from unwanted intrusions is another explanation thoughtfulness on the snare developer when selecting a host. The hosting assemblage's surveillance protocols should be outlined. Refuge from run-of-the-mill disclaimer of putting into play attacks and the distinct hacks and cracks that disposition be attempted on your server is essential. The hosting troop should be dependable for the benefit of upgrading and maintaining these guarantee measures. "The at worst deed worse than having no surety is ratiocinative you enjoy some" (Declaration the Host, 2001).

Customer Employment
Aid is another eminent facet to make allowance for when shopping for a host. Hosts put up for sale a sort of client usefulness options. Services offered can be 24-hour chime sovereign number, 24-hour email help, Often Asked Questions pages and help forums. The amount of help you authority need depends in general on your familiarity and problems you set-to from the server.
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Reliability
Checking excuse the reliability of a advice is also uncommonly important. Hosts inveterately fool very many backup systems in example in any event something goes off beam with the gas main servers. They also can bond less "down span" through backup power systems such as a diesel generator.

[Tony_Biokimask]

Just a quick hello ..... Quite new to web forums and exploring all my options. Looking forward to learning from you all ... Tony

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[JamieUKs]

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